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“You’re late!” Sai greeted. She tried to make a face when I entered the clinic. I smiled at her. She’s fine.
“There was a fuss in the corridors because no one’s making sure that everything was in order. Tsk! Tsk! So I have to fight my way here.” I said jokingly.
“Oh! I really shouldn’t be here. Let’s go back. Was there a fight? Where is it? Was it Junno and Rex, again? Oh! I am neglecting my duties.” Worry filled her face.
“Calm down. The girls are just going gaga over the new transferee.” I said. “You worry so much. They should learn to stand by themselves. It’s not like you’re always there to watch over the whole school. You’re the SC President not the babysitter.” I added. “Don’t overexert yourself. Let the teachers have something to do. It’s their job anyways.” I concluded with a sigh.
“Yes boss.” She replied pouting. “By the ways, how was it?” she said winking at me. I don’t have the slightest idea what she’s talking about. I guess my look gave me away. She continued, “The new transferee. If he’s making a fuss, I bet he’s really someone.” She looked at me expectantly. But what does she expect? It took me a moment to realize what she’s thinking. I rolled my eyes. A pain in my chest formed.
“What about him?” I tried to play innocent though I know it won’t work. She knows me too well just like the way I know her.
“Nothing.” She replied sheepishly and apologetically. Oh! Did my face give away the pain? Stupid human emotions. “I’m sorry.” She said almost like a whisper. “I should have known better that…” she trailed off and bit her lower lip.
“What are you saying sorry for? No harm done.” I replied trying to put a smile on my face. More pain. Go away! I wrapped her arm around my shoulder and said, “Let’s go?” I wish she wouldn’t notice my trembling. Luckily, she knew better to let it slip so we walked back to class in silence
That was faster than I thought. School was over and the corridors were buzzing with students. I made my way pass the crowd trying to get the least possible attention. The pain was still there. I want to go home and rest as if that would make it all go away.
“CLAAAIIIRRREEE!!” I heard someone screamed at me. It was too close. My eardrums were ringing. It was like static. The speaker’s voice was so high pitched.
“Allen? What is it?” There was no mistake. I looked back and saw a petite blonde standing a couple of feet away from me. I can’t believe she’s actually a year older than me. She’s just 4’4 making her look so fragile. Her azure eyes glistened with her hair while her well-rounded lips curved into a pout. She looked at me with those puppy dog eyes. A total lolita.
“Phew! You noticed me at last. I’ve been calling you for quite some time now screaming, rather. Where are you going?” she asked in an enthusiastic tune. I want to meet with Sai and go home right this instant. When I failed to reply, she said “Don’t tell me you forgot about today’s practice?” I totally forgot about that. When I was about to reply, she cut me saying, “Oh! You really did forget. You know that we have an upcoming tournament. You can’t just skip practice even if you are the soon to be captain, Claire-chi.” She winked at me. “C’mon, let’s go.” she said then grabbed my wrist.
“Allen…” I tried to make the words come out. I never missed any practice before until that happened. The flashbacks started again. I sat on one corner of my murky room. I held my knees closer to my body to make me feel safer. Misery crept into every cell of my body, but it originated somewhere. It hurt so badly. All I know was the existence of the pain. I know my heart still exists for I am still alive, somehow. But at the same time, I could feel that it was long gone – shattered into pieces.
“Claire-chi? Are you okay?” I was dumbfounded longer than I thought. Even though that was just a flashback of what happened, the pain was here. It existed and will always exist. No! I don’t want that. He was a total jerk so no harm done and there was no loss. I told myself, over and over again.
“I’m fine. I totally forgot about that. Effects of the upcoming chemistry exams…” I said trying to bluff my way out. I believe I’m good at this. Hope it works on Allen as much as it works on almost everyone else except Sai ofcourse.
“Chemistry!! Uh! Don’t mention it. I struggled hard to skip that subject.” She replied totally convinced and side tracked. “I know how you feel right now so go home early. My head hurts even from the slightest thought of it.” She continued and clasped her tiny head with her dainty hands and making those cute gestures you see in those cartoons. At first, I can hardly believe that this little girl is the captain of the archery team. But once you see her hold a bow, she becomes an entirely different person.
“Sorry for the trouble. I’ll catch tomorrow” I said trying to break off the conversation. Luckily, she let it go that easily.
“Roger, chief!” she said then imitated a salute – a loli kind of salute. She grinned and turned her back on me. “See you tomorrow.” She paused and said; “I suggest pain killers.” A sweet chuckle came out of her lips as she walked away. I wasn’t sure if she saw through my disguise or if she’s referring to the headache for the Chemistry exams. If it was just the exams, I believe I’ll be able to handle the pain but if it was the throbbing pain in the chest I think pain killers won’t even have effect on it. I know.
I walked quietly along the busy corridors. Sai was standing near the gate with a really worried expression – worrying about me I guess. It was not her fault that there’s this pain. Like me, she did not know. It was his fault or so I told myself. But deep inside, I believe it was my fault. No’ it wasn’t! Was it my fault to fall helplessly in love with a jerk? I don’t know. But I had a gut feeling back then. You saw it Claire, the e-mail. You just let your stupid emotions cloud your brain.
While having this debate with myself, I did not notice that Sai was already in front of me.
“Hey, Claire!” She automatically changed her expression to a smile. “I was right to wait for you. I guessed you would skip the practice.”
“Oh!” Trying to compose myself, I uttered, “Yeah, have to review for the exams.” Lie. I know it did not fool her even just a bit but at least I’m trying hard to look well, right? That’s what’s important.
She did not say anything but just looked at me with her fake smile and worried eyes. I instantly looked away and started to walk home while she followed limping. I just noticed that she was holding the broken bike. “Going home already? I thought you have a council meeting today?” I took the bike from her.
“Uhm. I don’t feel like attending. It’s not that important anyways.” Translation: I am worried about you. But she doesn’t have to say it out loud for me to understand.
Just like before, we walked in silence. She was looking down while I played with the little trinket she gave me on my phone. When I wasn’t able to take it, I muttered, “Sai… don’t…”
“No. Please don’t say it. I know it was my fault. I shouldn’t have…” she interrupted. I stopped at once and turned to face her. It was a good thing that this street was almost deserted.
“It wasn’t! Like me, you did not know that he was a total jerk!” I cried. I don’t want to add more guilt in my conscience. “Remember, you warned me when I told you about that message but I did not listen.” It was never her fault.
“But… I could have stopped you. I shouldn’t have introduced you to him. So, it is my fault. I caused you that…” she cried. She was almost in tears.
“Please Sai. We’ve talked about this before. It wasn’t your fault.” I held her dainty face between my hands, hoping to comfort her. “I’ll be fine… Promise.” I hoped.
Her immensely black eyes were filled with tears. “C’mon. Stop this. I should be the one consoling you not the other way around.” And there it was – a soft chuckle. I brushed the tears running down her cherry pink cheeks. She raised her hands the same gesture as mine. I hadn’t notice. I was also crying. There we were looking like fools in the middle of the street. But as she hugged me, I felt the truth to what I had said. I would heal. I don’t know when but I know I will. That’s what matters.
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Comments/criticism would be welcomed with open arms. >:D<
